the_freak | Dear Billy

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Dear Billy

It was risky, hanging around the hospital like this when pretty much all of Hawkins was still convinced he was to blame for all of this, but Eddie felt like he owed it to Max to visit. It was rough seeing her like that. And he couldn't help the gnawing guilt that if any of them should have lost to this thing it was him. Each of them meant so much to so many people, and here he was, bruised and bandaged, but alive. And the only person who might have cared to know it had to think he was dead. It didn't seem fair.

He ducked outside for a smoke, keeping his head down, but people were too preoccupied with the mess that had opened up under them to be worried about hunting the Freak. As far as they were concerned the Munson boy was dead, and good riddance.

Trying to get the damn smoke to light, Eddie grew still, eyes suddenly catching a familiar set of piercing blue ones, and seeing that moment of recognition in them he paled. He abruptly turned tail, walking aimlessly around the side of the building and praying silently he'd only imagined that look of recognition.

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What on earth was Eddie talking about? Billy stares at him with evident shock on his face. It sounded like something out of a story - the one the metalhead refers to. A fantasy. It wasn't possible. But before he can protest anything, his eyes slip shut and he goes limp in the chair.

Before his head can hit the table, he's up, grabbing Munson out of his and throwing him down on the floor. "What the fuck are you doing?!" He heaves a little for breath, looking furiously down at the other.

"Jesus-" Eddie's moving to try and stop Billy from smacking his head when Hargrove emerges, and he only has a short moment for recognition to cross over his face before he's been tossed about again. He grits his teeth, but has the sense to stay down.

"He's knows something's going on, what the hell am I supposed to do?! Tell him it's totally normal to keep passing out and losing chunks of time??" he counters, scooting back and leveling a challenging look at the other.

Hargrove stands over him, the uneven curls framing his face as he glares down at Eddie. "It's not your information to give! I'm keeping him safe! We're dead and if this terrifies him that I can't keep in control and he goes around yelling that there's another him, what's going to happen?! Huh?"

It's tempting to swing his foot into Eddie's side, but he holds back. Eddie is trying to help after all. "They'll fucking lock us up in that mental hospital outside of town and it'll be like the God damn lab again!"

He leans down and grips Eddie by the collar and gives a little shake. He almost... looks desperate. "I have to keep him safe, Munson. We can't go back into the dark again."

"You're dead, I think that's going to spark some conversations regardless of how nuts you look," Eddie counters with a frustrated huff. He understands Hargrove's point, but he's not sure how the hell he's supposed to handle this. He all ready doesn't know what to do with himself, let alone a whole other vulnerable human.

"Nnn-" Eddie tries to grasp Hargrove's wrist to stop him from rattling his brains out. "Fine," he hisses, "I won't tell him. The hell do you think I'm trying to do, Hargrove? I don't want any of us getting snatched up."

"I don't want to be seen as nuts, that's your job. And you're good at it," and thankfully he does stop shaking Eddie. Hargrove doesn't let go of the shirt though.

When he speaks again, it's still got a hardness to it, but it's softer. "I don't want him to be scared. I think this'll scare him and he's been through so much already Munson. I have to keep protecting him," which probably explained why Hargrove seemed to take over when a threat was present.

Edited 2023-05-20 23:58 (UTC)

Eddie scoffs, rolling his eyes but not arguing. He's good at it whether he likes it or not.

"He's all ready scared," he argues, but sighs, and nods. "...how am I supposed to explain this?" he asks, motioning pointedly to the position they're in?

Hargrove doesn't want Billy to know. But Munson has his own good points to go against Hargrove's. And the other side deserves to know, right? The hold on the collar loosens until he's just got his hands against Munson. Finally, "I don't know." Because he doesn't. And maybe he should've just let the other tell the other side.

He looks away, brows furrowed. "I can feel it so much more when he's scared. When it gets too much..." Hargrove switches their places. Hands leave and he backs off to give Munson space. The Spaghettios bubble on the stove.

He goes to stir it. Ignores the headache that he's aware of now that this thing with Munson is nearly passed. "...I don't know what to do."

Sighing, Eddie's slow to pick himself back up, still sore from their previous scuffle, and the demobats, and generally all of life. And he gets it. As much as he can.

"I won't tell him right now. But if this is going to be a thing...eventually he's going to have to know. You'd want to know if you were the one who didn't know about him, right? Or if there was some third side- there's not, is there?"

"Only the two of us. Billy and Hargrove." The quiet voice again. And he knows that Munson is right. Billy should know because if the roles were reversed, he would want to know. The pot gets stirred again, to keep the food from burning to the bottom.

He's silent, only the stove knobs clacking into place as he turns the burner off. Hargrove flashes a smile over his shoulder at him. "Think you could even handle three of us, Munson? You're barely keeping it together with two."

"Good thing you don't have a middle name," he teases. He shouldn't make light, but it makes things easier.

He laughs, returning the smile, "Fuck no. And I'm flattered it looks like I'm even slightly keeping it together. I don't have a fucking clue what I'm doing, Hargrove. I'm terrified."

"That you know of," but Munson is right - Billy doesn't have one. Maybe his nickname that just stuck as his regular name was enough of one. Finding a couple of bowls, the mixture is spooned into even portions and carried over to the table with utensils. He sits and stirs his own slowly.

"The fuck are you scared for, Munson? That I'll beat the shit out of you if you fuck up?"

Look at Hargrove just taking over. Not that Eddie minds. He finds his seat again and accepts his portion, taking a large spoonful while it's still too hot and cursing.

"Well..." Eddie shrugs and gestures vaguely, "Yeah. And uh...also I don't wanna hurt him. Or you. And the world might be ending. And I'm still wanted for murder. So...lots of things to be fucking scared of right now."

Something familiar. Having to set the table for Susan, with Neil's hard gaze watching him. Responsibilities or some bullshit like that. Susan was always glad for the help.

He blows on his spoonful, then eats it silently and takes the time to listen to the other teen. "Murder that you didn't do," he points out, almost looking skeptical "So now you're dealing with that, and us. A dead guy that's split into two personalities."

Another bite. "So what's the plan then, Munson?"

Eddie continues to shovel in spoonfuls until he's used to the burn, never quite learning his lesson.

"Yeaah, I miss when not flunking out for a third time was all I had to worry about," he agrees.

"I don't fucking know...call my friends? They know more about all this Upside Down shit than me, and they have connections. They should be able to help keep you guys safe."

Hargrove is slower at eating the food, letting it cool in the spoon before taking the bite. He frowns around the utensil before stirring again. "This isn't Upside Down bullshit. This is my brain. Our brain." It was just the aftermath of it all. No Vecna, no Mind Flayer this time.

"I don't think anyone can really help." More stirring. "I probably just gotta lay low for awhile. Long awhile. There's no telling how the fuck people are going to react to us. Especially if they find us together."

"...I dunno then. I don't even know what to do about myself. I'd say get the hell out of Hawkins, but I doubt you wanna leave Max, and I don't feel right leaving everyone else to deal with all this doomsday shit."

"They'll probably assume I made you rise from the dead to do my bidding," Eddie mutters.

"We're not leaving Max," and that's said with a determined tone. He glances at Eddie with a hard stare to match it. Then a few more spoonfuls get eaten and he sits back with the hard stare melting into a smirk.

"With all the shit that's happened, that's probably the most normal thing they could expect from you." He glances around and finally lets his gaze linger out of the window. Then to the clock on the stove. It's late.

"I'll do the dishes. We should probably sleep after that, figure out what to do tomorrow." He looks back to Eddie. "I don't know who will wake up, but if it's quiet, it'll probably be Billy."

"Well then you are I are probably going to be seeing a lot of each other, 'cause Hawkin's is...a real mess right now," Eddie warns.

"Mm," he nods, and glances at Hargrove with a faint frown. "...how are you handling all this?" he asks. If Hargrove's dealing with all the bad so Billy doesn't have to, then who's looking out for him?

Hargrove goes quiet, thinking about Mac and everything that's happened since that fateful night in the mall. All the nights that followed locked away. He tries not to dwell on anything for too long, afraid of what might happen emotionally.

It's Munson's question that snaps him back to attention. And he just stares at Eddie, completely stunned by it. No one's ever asked him how he's doing - as either Billy or Hargrove. He supposes being split is new, so of course no one's asked him.

"I'm handling it," he finally answers, though Hargrove doesn't look like he even believes that. Maybe because he's not handling it well, but he doesn't know what to do. They don't teach this sort of shit in school. He runs a hand through the shortened curls.

A soft sigh and he tilts his head back. "…it's rough. I don't know what I'm up against anymore and everything is a mess and I just want us safe, Munson."

"I'll do my best to keep you guys that way," he offers, though he doesn't look too confident himself, "Is uh- is there a way I can get you out that doesn't involve you trying to kick my ass?" he asks, offering a small smirk, "You know, if we need to have a chat?"

At least Eddie knew that Hargrove could still pummel him if it came to him. He was weaker now, starved and thin, but he still knew how to fight. Hargrove straightens up in his chair and finishes off the food in his bowl, then takes it to the sink to rinse out.

"Well, that is the easiest way to get my attention. There is just shouting for me." He turns his head to look at Eddie. "I'm usually under the surface, waiting."

Watching.

Or maybe he was saying that to spook Eddie.

"..." Eddie tries not to look like the words get to him, but he's not great at masking his emotions.

"Love an audience," he quips, "I had set up the bed for Billy, but then he slept on the couch earlier, you can go where ever you're comfortable."

Well it would explain why Hargrove was so quick to slide back into the driver's seat of Billy's body. The changes had been so quick when the blond felt threatened. He thinks about the options of where to sleep.

"...I don't want to sleep alone. If he wakes from a nightmare, I don't know what'll happen if I can't get control." Maybe the screaming had been because of the two of them wrestling about for control after being startled awake so hard. Hargrove hopes what he's indicating gets across to Munson. He's a creative freak, he should be able to pinpoint the meaning quick enough.

"..." Eddie thinks he gets his meaning, eyes darting about a little, suddenly flustered, both shy about being right but also reluctant to assume wrong. "...both in the bed?" he clarifies, "And Billy's not going to kick my ass when he goes from 'we need to talk' to 'waking up in bed beside me'?"

Why was the other flustered now? He had seen Billy nearly naked, cut his hair, held him and soothed him through a nightmare. Hargrove gets up and starts towards the entrance to the living room so he can get to the stairs. "No, he won't do that."

A pause. "He trusts you," even if this side didn't fully trust yet.

"Sleeping with someone else in the bed might help with nightmares, Munson."

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